Standing on the crumbling edge,
I viewed the vastness of the Abyss
with disbelief: this cannot be.
Yet it was, and is.
I had avoided this place for years.
Fearsome place, I knew what it was,
but now, I was here, watching
the ones on the other side.
Curious thing: I could see them arrive,
yet they never remained.
Where did they go?
I thought: I have been jaded for so long.
calloused,
having sat in the mocker’s chair
for a lifetime.
Feet at the brink,
I looked over
never expecting into that vast and empty void
to be so terrible.
The soulless chasm rose up,
filled me with itself.
Never
had I felt such wrenching emptiness,
such abject loss,
such mourning of a life misspent.
On the far side,
clad in light,
He beckoned.
“Come,” he said.
Come to me.”
“I cannot!” I cried.
“It is too far … too far …
No … I … cannot!”
Despair clanged its leaden bell in my ear.
At my shoulder,
whispering doubt and fear,
the purveyor of evil spoke:
“Fool, He cannot help you now,
He does not even want you.
He wants only your
contribution to the Abyss.
You know,”
~he scratched his chin~
“to him, you’re but one more tally on his scorecard.”
His words rent holes in my heart.
On the other side,
He raised his arm, beckoned.
“Come,” He said.
“Come unto me
and the void shall be filled,
the shard made whole,
the Truth be known.”
The Abyss darkened, swallowing the air.
“But,” I said, “I am not ready.
I am afraid.
Too far … too much to ask.”
“Not so,” He replied.
it is but a single step.”
“He lies,” whispered the Dark One,
“he lies. Remember his scorecard?
Your soul is nothing but a hashmark.”
I turned, looked into the
blackness of the eyes of
the author of lies.
Is it possible that this once,
he spoke the truth?
But …
There, on the other side …
Hope, is that you?
Again, I looked into the Abyss.
Overwhelmed by its endless emptiness.
This is my life;
this is who I am.
Patient,
He stood there on the brink.
Compelling, so compelling …
I asked,
“Are you truly the son of God?”
“Yes, it is so.
Come,
come and know my Peace,
for you are weary and heavy laden.
Come, and take my Yoke
upon your shoulders.
My load is light.”
Aching from the darkness etched into my empty soul,
drained by the burden of guilt and sin,
I wanted only to be done.
Able no longer to bear my own existence,
exhausted by the pursuit of my grail of clay,
I stepped …
Hands reached out,
grasped my own.
The scars seemed to glow with love.
My heart shattered into dust.
“You have done that for me?” I asked.
“Yes. It was for you.”
It was not grief or shame that
fell me to my knees
and loosed my tears,
but grace I had never known.
“I am so unworthy …”
“True. But that is not the reason.”
“Then why?”
“Because I love you.”
Tears fell,
giving way to gasping sobs as
comprehension unfolded:
It was His Sacrifice
alone
that rendered the depth,
the breadth,
the length,
the height
of Love itself.
His Song of Love
rang out,
it filled my soul,
it healed my heart,
and embraced me in arms of Grace.
Tears, unabated,
unashamed,
fell and fell and fell.
He lifted me,
embraced me in loving arms,
and I knew
I was forever changed.
That which I had sought for a lifetime
I now found in utmost simplicity:
it was the Love of God.
“Jesus, my friend …?
“Yes?”
“What now?”
His smile warmed my heart.
“Follow me.”